The Last Straw

Finally the bubble burst.
When something you believed in, you believed something to be true,
and all of a sudden you come to know it was a lie….
And you can’t tell it to anyone since the truth isn’t yours to share.

Living in a bubble is comforting. It is reassuring.
If everything else is going wrong you at least think that one thing is in place.
But no. It never was.

Sick n tired of knowing.
There are some things I don’t need to know.
I want to live in my bubble. My perfect world.

But I can’t anymore. I can’t because of the truth.
I can’t be the pigeon who chose to close his eyes when he saw the cat coming.
Or maybe I’m. Coz I don’t really have a choice, do I?
It sucks. Everything sucks.

And yet again. As always.
Life goes on…

Friendships, Feelings And More

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“It’s all about Trust.
Sharing your feelings with friends…
To say or not to say???”
– Realist Rebel

There are many friendships which go way beyond the usual hunky-dory hang outs and chilling together. Most people are of the category who have back-ups for their necessary outgoing “social life”. Can we really call them “friends”??

Maybe those are the kind who are known as a “fair-weathered friend”.

There is another kind. Who come a little far from the previous type. The expression “a friend in need is a friend indeed”, probably got inspired from them.

And then there are some, very rare species these days, friends who have a connection. A real one. Who can really understand what the other is saying or not saying. Such friendships, if found, must be treasured for life.

Some people talk a lot yet say very little. 

They will go on and on, just incessantly blabbering away about everyday nothings and never truly reveal what they are feeling. Such people are either hiding something or they don’t trust you enough to talk about personal stuff.

Some people talk less yet manage to say a lot.

They remain quiet usually. But when they talk everything makes sense. They wont directly reveal their feelings but if you listen closely, you might just be able to figure out.

Yup there are other kinds too. Talk and say a lot at the same time or do neither!

Well, the neither case would be extreme but, you never know… Some people just prefer to remain silent altogether. Usually they do it around the people they don’t trust at all. Not even a bit.

And then there are people who are a mixture of the above mentioned types!!

Maybe I’m the mixture kind! 😀

But honestly, I feel this has got more to do with the person I’m talking to rather than what kind of a person I am, which decides how and what am I gonna talk about with them.

eg. I will truly reveal my feelings (most of it) only when I trust the other person and believe that they really care and bother to hear me out! (And not because they need some material for gossip…yeah BEWARE of THAT type! Seriously.)

I don’t know if that’s the right thing to do or not, maybe it’s right for me or whatever! But this is what I do, this is what I am. I trust my gut feeling and instincts or intuition or anything you wanna call it, and just go with it.

When someone shares their feelings, I respect that person and if they are telling something in confidence (like a secret), never ever break their trust.

I love my friends (the few true friends I have) and I really do treasure them.

When they tell me how they feel (however direct or indirect) it feels good that they trust me. And when I share my feelings, it feels good that I have someone who cares.

Cheers to friendship!

I hope everyone has a friend they can be themselves with.

And is the same type as you are! 😛 (You should be so lucky!!)

Much Love,

– Realist Rebel ❤

Uncharted Territory

There are times when I don’t know what to write. Much like the times when I can’t figure out what to do, which option to choose and which to forego.

Difficult times. running away isn’t an option. Every other door is closed. Desperately trying to figure out where the window might be…

Funny thing about making decisions (life changing ones) is that you know once you give in, you are done. There is no going back, no do overs. That is what makes it all the more challenging.

But the real question here is to see how long can you avoid the inevitable.

The quest of the unknown continues…


PS: This is also sort of an apology for not being regular with my posts. I kinda have been caught up in my own mind! Gonna try to be regular now. Thanks for being so patient with me.

Much love ❤

– Realist Rebel

Truth Behind “Moved On”

There are different things that different people want from us. It’s up to us to decide who is worth all the trouble. On the contrary, finding out what we really want, is precisely the most important and most tedious task to be accomplished.

Always heard about guiding Angels and guiding Light that lead us and show us the way to get through the difficulties we are facing. But in reality, one day we wake up and see what we have been looking for doesn’t even exist! Then nothing and nobody can help. Being here in this world alone and facing every problem with a brave and positive attitude is what we need to do just about every day. I mean, we can’t deny this fact that someday we need to give up on “fairy tale” happy ending myths; and the belief of “prince charming” sweeping you off your feet….. ain’t really gonna happen that way! Barring a few exceptions of course, but let’s get real.

When the time comes to face the reality, everything is supposed to change; but obviously it doesn’t. There is no magic wand that would change everything as quickly as we wish it to. Yet somehow, we forget – forget that amidst all the growing up, moving on and facing reality, there remains a part inside us which still wants and craves for the things we wanted; exactly the way we wanted them – the perfect way.

Yes, the reality check here would be to search ourselves, look within to find out the truth behind the crap, “oh chill! I have moved on man!” – What can be the truth? Is it so easy to move on? Even if it’s not, yet somehow most of us get there. But later don’t really bother to see deep down and realize just how much we got hurt in the process. The feelings which were curbed down, the thoughts that were brushed aside, the memories which were sacked and pushed in the corner, the emotions that were tied down and the desires which were brutally killed – altogether did the damage that they could to the heart and the soul which eventually stopped living.

Moving on is not a joke. It’s neither easy nor difficult. It’s basically the only choice left when someone leaves or we leave someone. Yes it applies in both cases. Anybody saying otherwise would be lying.

Also, the duration for moving on varies for people. Time required to finally get over someone, can’t be estimated. But one thing is for sure, 100% recovery isn’t done when you think it’s done. There are times in our lives, when we can really surprise ourselves. There can be a possibility that we may realize that all this time we didn’t really move on; we only thought we did. Just not giving the same amount of attention to that person anymore in our lives doesn’t mean that we don’t want those things anymore which we always wanted. People make mistakes, poor judgments, unrealistic expectations, but hey, it can’t always work as one sided! A relationship has to be a two-way street at all times. Even if a person is supporting the other, it can only work if the latter is willing to accept it. Otherwise it would be like banging your head against a wall and you’ll only end up hurting yourself.

There is nothing wrong in (still) wanting the things we craved for earlier. Moving on only says that we are strong enough to let go. It doesn’t mean the end of the world or end of love and relationships.  Some things and people are just not meant to be with us. Maybe they belong with someone else, maybe it’s not the right timing or maybe it’s something else. That is part of life. I’m not saying that it shouldn’t have happened since everything happens for a reason. Besides, it’s an integral part of growing up and being mature about things; all this without losing faith and hope. So rather than just saying “moved on”, we should really do move on with life and live it the way we want; without worrying about anybody else. After all, we get only one life; make every moment count.

Mind Games

moving_optical_illusions_1-Patty

Writing 201 : Poem Assignment #3

Prompt: Trust

Form: Acrostic

Device: Internal Rhyme



Every day, people change in every way.

Most of the story I made up, has a trustworthy backup.

Oblivion to anyone but me, thoughts playing out to see

The reactions they get, from people they have met.

Invitations were inevitable, if only they were amicable.

Otherwise they say something, and mean something else.

Nobody shows their real feelings, for they fear dealing.

Shadows of secrets remain covered in closets.



The Writing 201 course is much more difficult than I thought it would be! Am already behind on the assignments, and there must be even tougher assignments ahead in the next week. Maybe because am forcing myself to use all the three things given and combine them to write my poem, am feeling I have been trapped! My free flow creativity gets hampered because of such constraints. Nonetheless, many people are doing it easily and so should I. And am so happy and excited as I am learning such new things.

But am also worried because I am not being able to access the Commons. Same problem I encountered earlier, due to email address mismatch I suppose. Hence am not able to get any feedback properly. So please please, leave your feedback, I would appreciate it so very much. Thanks in advance! 😉

Think Twice

It’s a matter of time before how things really get intense and more often than not, out of hand. And it’s not always necessary that you are conscious enough to realize it in time or before it’s too late. On the contrary, you are more likely to realize it when you have already lost the bet. Hence it’s wise to think twice before taking your decisions, not after, otherwise it would only be like crying over spilt milk, and you can’t really do anything other than crying then, can you?

Realization can be a hard process. There are always triggers and signs you ought not to miss. Perhaps there shall lay another story round the corner, just like yours, to catch up and learn early, but then for how long can you rely on fairy tales or other people’s lives to show you the way? Hanging around the mess others create to learn how to straighten out your own, will not be considered smart. It would indeed be just the opposite. Watch out!

Behavior-o-logy !!

Isn’t it ironic that people try to be at their best behavior during social interactions with the outside world, when clearly they should be more careful about the things they say to those who are really close to them – family and friends.

Because people who will feel hurt by your behavior and words, would be the ones who are attached to you emotionally; and not those who may be good to you on your face but bitch about you behind your back.

People who truly care for you, and value what you think/say – they are the ones who genuinely deserve your best behavior.

So go ahead, give them the best of you, and surely they’ll appreciate and treasure it more than you could ever imagine. 🙂

Another Drama

There are times when you feel you are going in the right direction. However slow you might be going, but you are going to get there. Then suddenly, boom! Something happens, you see something, you feel it’s a sign, and everything you have been doing till now feels wrong. So wrong, that even you yourself start questioning the path you have taken.

Why isn’t there a better way to know for sure that yes! Yes, you are on the right track? It has had been so difficult to take that decision already, of moving on, of forgetting the past (only been trying, not succeeding) that now anything which even hints that all this has been for nothing, sends me into a frenzy.

It scares me now. How many times is history going to repeat itself? I’m tired of the games destiny has been playing with me. My life must be a cosmic joke to the universe! Whenever I feel, ‘all right now, this is it.’ At the exact same moment, life throws another curve ball. The drama continues.

After all Shakespeare was right:

“All the world is a stage and all the men and women merely players.”

Let’s just keep playing our roles.

Que sera, sera.

Bewildered

Have you ever experienced something which felt unreal? Ever felt what happened in reality was like a dream? I did. The past few days went by so quickly that I didn’t even get a chance to pause and ponder that what is going on?! Like something which was forced over me. Some kind of evil power at work. i wasn’t able to think or use my head properly. Like it was some sort of dream and reality was different. I had lost my senses. Living in a bubble. Experienced another world, a different zone altogether. It was so creepy now that i think about it. How could i possibly let it happen? What made me blind? What made me paralyzed? What made me stop using my brain?

The whole matter went about in front of me like it was some sort of motion picture and i was a mere spectator. Now i want to slap myself for letting it happen in the first place. I wish i could go in time and fix everything, stop myself from doing what i accidentally let happen, just erasing everything i could. It just feels like the worst nightmare of all times. What was it? I was acting on some kind of imagination? Some fragment of my imagination popped out of my head and started dancing in front of me that i couldn’t judge right from wrong, truth from lie, real from imaginary! It felt just like I was hypnotized and someone else was controlling my actions and my brain as well. Surreal.

What could possibly be the logical explanation behind all this? I still am in shock; unable to believe it was all real. Such kind of incidents are not supposed to happen to good people. But then who made that rule? Who decides such stuff? Where and what is the truth? The quest continues…